Monday, November 30, 2009

Random Rants

Red Ribbon Day

Tomorrow's World AIDS Day. As the line goes, "Spread the word, not the virus."

As for me, well, I've been restraining myself from playing around. It's been weeks and believe me it's really not easy. I've been trying to divert my attention and energy by hanging out more with friends and by doing a little shopping.

A Bag Problem

I've been looking for a good bag recently and unfortunately, there's really not a lot of choices. So the other day, after my follow-up consultation with the doctor, I roamed around Megamall and bought this 5cm bag partially out of impulse. It's the last piece so I kind of panicked. I've been eyeing on the black version of it but that one's already gone.

Not bad right?

The trusty bag that I've been using almost everyday for nearly 2 years now is so worn out it's embarrassing. It served me very well though.

This bag has been everywhere with me.

The new bag is really nice but I don't know if I can use it everyday when I go to work. I was stupid enough not to notice that it doesn't have a zipper or any sort of closure on top. Ugh. But I'll figure it out.

Music Musings

Check out the Beyonce-Lady Gaga collaboration for "Video Phone" here. Unfortunately, it's not as spectacular as I thought it would be.

I love Leighton Meester's new song! "Somebody to Love" is a smooth, sultry pop song that also features Robin Thicke's sexy vocals. The video's pretty hot too.

Another song that I have on repeat is "Power's Out" by Nicole Scherzinger and Sting. It's a beautiful duet fit for these hard times.

Thursday, November 26, 2009


Today I went to Quiapo and Divisoria with my friend Jen to pick up some materials for the hat that I'm planning to make for my sister (don't ask).

Quiapo. It's amusing how this place is bustling with so much life. It's a shame I couldn't get a better picture because we all know cell phones disappear in a flash around this area.

As expected, the trip was exhausting but still fun. Here's a few memorable moments in quotes:

"Bom! Bom! Bom!"
It's the lady vendor at Divi singing 'Boom Boom Pow'.

"Liveshow! Liveshow o, liveshow!"
I assumed this man was inviting everyone to come inside the dimly lit doorway somewhere in Recto. A few steps ahead, we saw a similar "establishment". Outside were pictures of scantily clad ladies. Gawd, I didn't know these things actually exist. And they operate in broad daylight!

"Wala po tayong tawiran sa gitna! Tawid kayo ng tawid! Mga tangaaa!"
He screamed like crazy to all the jaywalkers including yours truly. I swear to god I thought this traffic enforcer was losing it. My friend and I got lost in the middle of chaos that is Divisoria so we just followed everybody else. Everyone ignored him by the way.

He sells snakes by the sidewalk.

By sunset, after endless walking, the only thing I got is a pack of hair clips. We were either looking at the wrong places or Divi had a shortage of tulle today.

At the end of our unproductive trip, we decided to meet up with another friend, Hanna, who's visiting for a week. Not even the bumper-to-bumper traffic, noise and air pollution and the feeling of being filthy could stop us from dropping by Robinson's Manila for a little reunion. Not only did we get to catch up, I also got most of the materials for the hat/head piece.

Anyone heard of Astrotel? It's like a Startrek-inspired hotel somewhere in Quiapo. Sounds interesting.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Wake Up Call (Part 2)

I was literally shaking when the envelope containing my test result was handed to me. I was relieved upon reading 'Non-reactive' but I just had to see a doctor to have it interpreted anyway.

It's like a second chance or something. I'm not about to live a virtuous life but there will definitely be changes. I'm so thankful.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Wake Up Call (Part 1)

To say that the past weeks were insane would be a big understatement. It has been grueling, nerve wracking and it may just be the most difficult, depressing exprerience in a very long time.

As I have mentioned, I've had tonsilitis side by side with herpes zoster within the same week. A few days before these maladies surfaced, I met Mark. He and I had a good time together and had quite an interesting conversation which led to the discussion about HIV and AIDS.

After doing some research online, I stumbled upon some articles that indicate herpes zoster and swollen lymph nodes are some of the possible symptoms of HIV. Naturally, I was stunned. Each piece of information seemed to point at one direction. I got concerned so I did even more research.

After a week of meeting Mark and suffering from tonsilitis and herpes zoster plus a lot of research on the Internet, I was a wreck. I started recalling instances when I wasn't being careful enough. Out of the many exploits I've indulged in, I could recall five to be unsafe.

I started talking to friends who also got worried. But being the good friends that they are, everybody assured me that it's surely just me and that everything's ok. It comforted me how they said I'm just overreacting but some of them still encouraged me to get tested.

I did want to get tested as soon as possible but I had to wait for a couple of days due to a tight work schedule.

In the course of almost two weeks, I couldn't stop thinking about how I would tell my situation to my family in case I find out I am HIV positive. I haven't even come out to my parents about my sexuality yet and now, HIV?! How would they deal about this double whammy? How the hell am I supposed to spend the rest of my life knowing that I may go a lot sooner than everybody else?

I also got to thinking about how I've been living this past few years. While I wouldn't call my lifestyle wild, I have been subjecting myself to a lot of risks and haven't been 100% careful either.

I went to church this Sunday after work. I also prayed every night and every morning. I even asked the few friends that I confided in to say some prayers for me as well.

At first, it seemed like a far fetched idea since I have been careful almost all the time. But the thing is it only takes one time. I was reminded I am not invincible. And I exposed myself to great risks---for what, a few minutes' worth of fun and pleasure?

I imagined the guys I would call (after not being in touch for so long) to inform them and suggest that they get tested as well in the event the result turns out to be positive. I tried to be optimistic by thinking of the "perks" like having an interesting story worthy of a book or even a reality show! I also thought of getting involved with an organization and help spread awareness about HIV/AIDS. The thought of me having a clear purpose and direction in life somehow made the whole ordeal bearable.

This Wednesday, I finally went. Before getting my blood sample, the nurse(?) briefed me about what would happen in case I turn out to be HIV positive. He told me not to panic and coordinate with them. They would then refer me to the government for a reconfirmation test and help me out with the insurance. He also informed me that they will not divulge the matter to my company as there had been cases where the employer lets go of an employee upon learning the latter was HIV positive.

I was anxiously filling up the form (the one that has questions like "Multiple sex partners?") when this nurse continued to talk about the possibilities. He kept emphasizing that I should never panic and told me that they once had a patient who committed suicide after getting the unfortunate test result.

Once done with the procedure, he told me to get the result after three days. The experience is far from over.

Sunday, November 15, 2009


This man is incredible. He's like up there with the Tiger Woods, Michael Jordans, Michael Phelps and the rest of the record-breaking sports luminaries.

I hope Cotto's doing alright. He got beaten up pretty badly.

Congratulations Manny! Not sure about your political intentions but your athleticism is phenomenal. You make us extremely proud.


Thursday, November 12, 2009


And she does it again.

I resisted to post another video but it's too sick I just can't stop myself.

The song is catchy, the dancing is hot, and the fashion, jeezus (McQueen S/S 2010!). This will be hard to top.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Health Woes

My back is not completely well yet. And as if the swelling is not bad enough, just yesterday, disgusting rashes have started to spread on the same area. This shit is very disconcerting.

But it doesn't end there. Just the other night I had to see the doctor again. For the nth time this year, I once again have tonsilitis. My parents are concerned and suggested that I undergo a tonsilectomy. But I'm scared of the general anaesthesia.

Just last week, I was hanging out with this guy and we got to talking about STDs until he told me I should get an HIV test (he gets it yearly). I didn't really give it that much thought until this past couple of days. Dont't get me wrong, I do play safe but there's about five times when I foolishly didn't (the condom broke once).

I highly doubt it but can HIV detected through a CBC blood test? Can it least manifest any signs? My company physical exam tests turned out good.

Gawd, the paranoia is killing me.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

The New Just Dance

Love this.

I got my new computer today. My Aunt gave it to me. Awesomeness.

Saturday, November 07, 2009


One of the things I hate doing is spending money on medicines. But I had no choice today as my back has been killing me.

According to the doctor, I strained a muscle located right below the right shoulder blade. The damn thing has been bothering me for two days now. The swelling has been getting worse. I'm suspecting it was caused by not doing enough stretching before pumping iron at the gym last Wednesday.-- Maybe I should switch to running?

Hopefully, this gets well very soon. Until then, I'm downing pills for dessert.

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

Too Much Hype, Too Bad

If I were younger and less jaded I would've been scared to death by Paranormal Activity. But knowing that it's just a movie pulled down the thrill factor for me. The entire time, I kept wondering how they shot the scenes and shit like that.

Don't get me wrong, it had some freaky scenes. The part where the girl said, "I think we're going to be ok now" is very disturbing.

I'm not totally disappointed because it honestly doesn't suck but it's really a bad idea to watch a movie with so much expectations. I wanted PA to mess with my mind and keep me from sleeping but it didn't.

I watched the movie half past midnight. Maybe I should've turned the light off? Maybe the alternate ending is more my type of terror?

Anyhow, watch it (alone, during the night just like I did, but with the lights off) and tell me what you think.

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Paranormal Activity

Ok, so I just got a copy of this movie--from a sidewalk along Buendia no less (sorry Optical Media Board, curiosity can't wait). I may or may not watch it later tonight. It's literally in my bag right now. I was thinking of watching it in a theater but I'm not even sure if it's going to be shown here in the third world.

It's been a while since I've been scared shitless by a horror movie so I hope this one doesn't disappoint. Blair Witch Project is the first thing that I recall giving me major creeps and that's a long time ago. Both movies have the same mockumentary treatment.

This should be a good post-Halloween scare if it lives up to the buzz.